I saw something on Instagram earlier today and it was to do with the feeling of being weighed down, not physically but emotionally speaking. We all come with ‘baggage’ or a ‘past’, that’s what makes us all so interesting and different. However, do you wear that baggage on you where it is weighing you down? I thought I would touch on a few things that I have found are examples of emotional baggage we do not need to carry with us. In order to grow into the best version of ourselves, we need to let go.
Talking about my past is something I have done A LOT through my journey with mental health because it played a big part in why I developed the problems I had. I am VERY careful that when I talk into existence about my past, that I am speaking from a place of power over the situation. We all have something that has happened to us where we play victim to it, because well life isn’t fair. The problem with victimisation is that we tend to wear it like a label. Something that I had to learn very quickly through my therapy for anxiety was that I am not my illness. I used to get so defensive and sometimes angry at what has happened to me from my childhood. Thing is, I can’t change what happened, but I can change where I go from here. I have a choice. I can either fall victim to my own life, or I can use my story to create something more powerful that I know. Boys and girlies, life is not happening to us, we are happening to life.
I also remember that I used to use my past as a way to give a heads up to anyone coming into my life, especially new relationships. I remember so clearly feeling like I had a duty to tell any new guy I was dating all my trauma and what I’ve been through and used it in a way to make me out like I am ‘damaged goods’ and that I needed to be taken care. Talk about flirting lol. I promote that it’s important to share and talk about our lives, and if you need support, go ahead and tell that person so. I found comfort in giving that person some of that ‘baggage’ too, it made me feel like I was handing some of the load off my shoulders.
I think it’s important to know the boundaries. Is talking about your past hurting and weighing another person down too?
“You do not have to hold yourself hostage to who you used to be”
I think we need to stop being so damn hard on ourselves. I feel like when you have experienced a mental health problem that debilitates you from doing everyday tasks, it makes you think, “I wish I could have done that” or “I wish I could do that if only I wasn’t anxious”. We feel like we missed out on so much of life in that period of time. But, OUR TIME WILL COME. Everything we go through and experience is not just coincidence or for no reason. The amount of parties and holidays I have missed out on because of my anxiety is pretty annoying lol. It all starts off with forgiving yourself and knowing that there is a reason to it all, even if you cannot see it yet.
“Don’t let your trauma, take away your power”
This kind of links everything I have said so far together. Sometimes we continue and WILLINGLY carry our emotional baggage with us and simply refuse to let go. But when this happens, we are preventing better things from entering our lives. I know for myself that I used to fear of letting go of certain things that have happened because I felt like I was ‘”giving in” and letting “it” win. We fear of letting go because we feel like the future will have nothing better to offer. I had to take a hard look at myself and say “This didn’t happen because it is not meant for me at this time in my life”. A quote I LIVEEEE for is “What is meant for you, can not be taken from you”. It’s so comforting and makes me feel at peace.
Being a victim to our current situation
It’s not just the past that can be weighing us down, it can be our current situation we are in. I’m always going to relate this back to mental health because I’m sure that’s why the majority of you come to my blog. Something I had to realise when I was going through my issues with anxiety, was that I am not “anxiety” itself. Mental health problems can feel like they consume you and take over every part of your life (believe me, I’ve been there). They can make you feel like your this “thing” that is not you. While yes, I may have anxious thoughts at times, but that does not define who I am. I am a sister, a girlfriend, a daughter and a bloody strong woman before all things. It definitely takes time to unfold the layers of who you are meant to be and who you are going to become. Do something you love and consume yourself in it, spend time with those that love and support you.
I hope this post helps any of you that may feel weighed down at the moment and just can’t really pin point the reason why. Follow me on Instagram, my DM is always open for support and chit chats.